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   Mexican navy kills 4 trying to rob back the body of Mexican drug boss "Pokemon". In other news, Mexican drug bosses "El Backyardigan", "Los Wow Wow Wubbzy", and "La Good Luck Charlie" unavailable for comment

30 Dec 2012 04:09 PM   |   3188 clicks   |   Chron
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Nothing To See Here     
Eeeechie Wow wow

30 Dec 2012 02:02 PM
Apos     
Uscanga[nicknamed "The Pokemon"] and the other four men were killed in a confrontation with the military


They caught them all!

30 Dec 2012 03:21 PM
Solid State Vittles     
In the Mexican navy, submarines are known as tortas.

30 Dec 2012 04:15 PM
thisisarepeat     
Mexican Navy? lol I picture a uniformed beaner traversing the Rio Grande on an inner tube with a flag on it.

30 Dec 2012 04:19 PM
uncleacid     
Cordoba famous for its corinthian leather.

30 Dec 2012 04:24 PM
Smgth     
I hate to ask the obvious question, but how did this guy get the name 'El Pokemon'?

30 Dec 2012 04:24 PM
MontanaDave     
Somewhat CSB, but there is a Latino truck mechanic I know who is called Pikachu. He actually resembles the character in a most striking (albeit non-yellow) fashion.

30 Dec 2012 04:27 PM
Bslim     
Mexican Navy? Similar to the British Space Program?

30 Dec 2012 04:29 PM
Badafuco     
The standard Mexican naval outfit while out to sea is cutoff Dickies and a wife beater.

30 Dec 2012 04:30 PM
IlGreven     
Josie from Beakman's World unavailable for comment.

30 Dec 2012 04:30 PM
starlost     
what the heck is a rob back?

30 Dec 2012 04:34 PM
Counter_Intelligent     
Navy Seals may have had problems dealing with..

Wooooobbuffet!!

30 Dec 2012 04:35 PM
Apos     

Smgth: I hate to ask the obvious question, but how did this guy get the name 'El Pokemon'?


Either he bore a striking resemblance to one of the many Pokemon creatures-perhaps Geoduck-or he was an avid fan/card collector, a hobby he happily indulged in when he wasn't killing cops or rival cartel members.


GIS-ing has failed to support either supposition, but you might have better luck.

30 Dec 2012 04:42 PM
Wise_Guy     

Badafuco: The standard Mexican naval outfit while out to sea is cutoff Dickies and a wife beater.


That's also one of the cartel's most feared punishments.

30 Dec 2012 04:42 PM
D_Evans45     
A quick hypothetical. Lets accept the fact that pretty much everyone who wants to use drugs is already using drugs. If we were to legalize heroin tonight, there would be no huge influx of people heading to the heroin store for a needle and some smack. Likewise with meth and crack and such, everyone who wants to tweak or be a crackhead is already doing it, legality be damned.

What if we as a country were to legalize and localize much of this drug production? Not only would our domestic hard drug use fall dramatically, the money that is spent on drugs would go to Americans, not rabid third world animals who dismember and mass murder each other for fun. Not even to make a profit, take all the money from the drug sales and put it straight into rehabilitation/awareness for the social benefit of the country. Portugal decriminalized hard drugs over a decade ago, and hard drug use fell by half. Source: Forbes. Turns out when you spend money actually trying to help people, instead of paying to lock them in holes, people start to get better.

Imagine how much taxpayer money would be freed up if we were only paying to incarcerate half of the current population for drugs. Wikipedia says "Perhaps the single greatest force behind the growth of the prison population has been the national war on drugs.The number of incarcerated drug offenders has increased twelvefold since 1980. In 2000, 22 percent of those in federal and state prisons were convicted on drug charges." Do away with the way on drugs mentality that packs prisoners into convict college at taxpayer expense, and start helping people with their problems at a fundamental level.

It would be interesting to see what would happen in Mexico if we decided to legalize and localize our drug production. The current clown show between wannabe Tony Montanas would cease to exist, or exist on a much smaller level. Id imagine a probable uptake in fraud and other type crimes as they scramble in a futile attempt to regain lost revenue, before they eventually cease to exist. These cartels are nothing without American drug money in their pockets.

/sorry if long rambling hypothetical is rambling

30 Dec 2012 04:45 PM
EdNortonsTwin     
It's a beautful world we live in.

30 Dec 2012 04:47 PM
studebaker hoch     
The Zetas don't quite have their act together yet.

30 Dec 2012 04:48 PM
wedun     
img.photobucket.comView Full Size

30 Dec 2012 04:53 PM
Fark Rye For Many Whores     
www.paklinks.comView Full Size
pkmncards.comView Full Size

30 Dec 2012 04:56 PM
Smgth     

Apos: Smgth: I hate to ask the obvious question, but how did this guy get the name 'El Pokemon'?

Either he bore a striking resemblance to one of the many Pokemon creatures-perhaps Geoduck-or he was an avid fan/card collector, a hobby he happily indulged in when he wasn't killing cops or rival cartel members.


GIS-ing has failed to support either supposition, but you might have better luck.


All I get is weird pages about drugs and Pokemon...not a surprising result, drugs were CLEARLY involved at some point in Pokemon's conception.

I'd like to think its because he caught all his enemies...in tiny little balls.

/balls

30 Dec 2012 04:57 PM
Oznog     
Is it just me, or are Pokemon names onomatopoeias of Dubstep music?

"Looooos Wow-Wow Wubbzy"....

30 Dec 2012 04:58 PM
gardenfreshtomatoes     
Watch a lot of Nick Jr, do ya', Subby?
Loves me some Backyardagains...

30 Dec 2012 05:04 PM
Quantum Apostrophe     
I read that as "Mexican gravy kills 4".

30 Dec 2012 05:19 PM
Enemabag Jones     
His attack was feeding his enemies to the lions.

30 Dec 2012 05:20 PM
Goodfella     
The whole "in other news" template for headline submissions was played out during the first Bush administration.

"in other news..."


"in other news..."


"in other news..."


"in other news..."


"in other news..."


"in other news..."


"in other news..."

"in other news..."

30 Dec 2012 05:22 PM
Nothing To See Here     
Navy ?

Send in the Seals !

img831.imageshack.usView Full Size

30 Dec 2012 05:29 PM
ko_kyi     

Nothing To See Here: Navy ?

Send in the Seals !


The DAWG (Dogfort Amphibious Warfare Group)

30 Dec 2012 05:39 PM
weirdneighbour     
Holy sheet!

30 Dec 2012 05:58 PM
Ex-Texan     
No doubt similar to their space program:Link

30 Dec 2012 06:08 PM
Anthracite     
Thank you for making me laugh Subby

30 Dec 2012 06:22 PM
Mixolydian Master     
In another article, one of the interviewed Marines said that the gang almost got away with it. One of the guys was doing some surveillance, when one of the gang members was looking around the corner, but suddenly sneezed, was heard by a guard and the whole plan then went to hell.

My Spanish is rusty, but he said it was basically a peek achoo, that sealed their fate.

30 Dec 2012 06:26 PM
feffer     
t.qkme.meView Full Size

30 Dec 2012 06:56 PM
ChubbyTiger     

Goodfella: The whole "in other news" template for headline submissions was played out during the first Bush administration.

"in other news..."


"in other news..."


"in other news..."


"in other news..."


"in other news..."


"in other news..."


"in other news..."

"in other news..."


Bugger off. It was funny.

/El Power Puff

30 Dec 2012 07:27 PM
ladyfortuna     
Maybe next they can catch whoever intercepted my merchandise shipment to Jalisco three weeks ago.

/it was a Wii controller
//not 'merchandise' merchandise...

30 Dec 2012 07:27 PM
Mr. Shabooboo     
Gotta catch em' all?

30 Dec 2012 07:52 PM
Smgth     

Mixolydian Master: In another article, one of the interviewed Marines said that the gang almost got away with it. One of the guys was doing some surveillance, when one of the gang members was looking around the corner, but suddenly sneezed, was heard by a guard and the whole plan then went to hell.

My Spanish is rusty, but he said it was basically a peek achoo, that sealed their fate.


I say boo, sir!

30 Dec 2012 08:06 PM
Turbo Cojones     

thisisarepeat: Mexican Navy? lol I picture a uniformed beaner traversing the Rio Grande on an inner tube with a flag on it.


The view from Mommy's basement must not include the port cities of Acapulco and Veracruz.

30 Dec 2012 08:19 PM
FuryOfFirestorm     
Rumor has it he was murdered by his rival, "El Digimon".

30 Dec 2012 08:20 PM
Wittenberg Dropout     

FuryOfFirestorm: Rumor has it he was murdered by his rival, "El Digimon".


See that would have been a better headline. The greenlit one is just fail.

30 Dec 2012 08:25 PM
CowboyUpCowgirlDown     
periodismohumano.comView Full Size


This is what the Mexican Navy is up against.

30 Dec 2012 08:39 PM
Nothing To See Here     

CowboyUpCowgirlDown: [periodismohumano.com image 650x366]

This is what the Mexican Navy is up against.


Does that shoot around corners or doesn't he know how to aim?

30 Dec 2012 09:09 PM
ThePastafarian     

D_Evans45: A quick hypothetical. Lets accept the fact that pretty much everyone who wants to use drugs is already using drugs. If we were to legalize heroin tonight, there would be no huge influx of people heading to the heroin store for a needle and some smack. Likewise with meth and crack and such, everyone who wants to tweak or be a crackhead is already doing it, legality be damned.

What if we as a country were to legalize and localize much of this drug production? Not only would our domestic hard drug use fall dramatically, the money that is spent on drugs would go to Americans, not rabid third world animals who dismember and mass murder each other for fun. Not even to make a profit, take all the money from the drug sales and put it straight into rehabilitation/awareness for the social benefit of the country. Portugal decriminalized hard drugs over a decade ago, and hard drug use fell by half. Source: Forbes. Turns out when you spend money actually trying to help people, instead of paying to lock them in holes, people start to get better.

Imagine how much taxpayer money would be freed up if we were only paying to incarcerate half of the current population for drugs. Wikipedia says "Perhaps the single greatest force behind the growth of the prison population has been the national war on drugs.The number of incarcerated drug offenders has increased twelvefold since 1980. In 2000, 22 percent of those in federal and state prisons were convicted on drug charges." Do away with the way on drugs mentality that packs prisoners into convict college at taxpayer expense, and start helping people with their problems at a fundamental level.

It would be interesting to see what would happen in Mexico if we decided to legalize and localize our drug production. The current clown show between wannabe Tony Montanas would cease to exist, or exist on a much smaller level. Id imagine a probable uptake in fraud and other type crimes as they scramble in a futile attempt to regain lost revenue, ...


Yeah but we have a private prison industry and a large populace of idiots who feel that imprisoning addicts is what's best for them.

30 Dec 2012 09:18 PM
Kenny B    [TotalFark]  
i62.photobucket.comView Full Size


Wanted for questioning.

30 Dec 2012 10:15 PM
Deep Contact     

CowboyUpCowgirlDown: [periodismohumano.com image 650x366]

This is what the Mexican Navy is up against.


Looks Mayan.

30 Dec 2012 11:45 PM
PsyLord     
i3.kym-cdn.comView Full Size

And not a single f*ck was given that day.

31 Dec 2012 12:02 AM
NephilimNexus     
Wasn't this a mission in GTA?

If not, it should have been.

31 Dec 2012 12:44 AM
Mouser     

D_Evans45: A quick hypothetical. Lets accept the fact that pretty much everyone who wants to use drugs is already using drugs. If we were to legalize heroin tonight, there would be no huge influx of people heading to the heroin store for a needle and some smack. Likewise with meth and crack and such, everyone who wants to tweak or be a crackhead is already doing it, legality be damned.

What if we as a country were to legalize and localize much of this drug production? Not only would our domestic hard drug use fall dramatically, the money that is spent on drugs would go to Americans, not rabid third world animals who dismember and mass murder each other for fun. Not even to make a profit, take all the money from the drug sales and put it straight into rehabilitation/awareness for the social benefit of the country. Portugal decriminalized hard drugs over a decade ago, and hard drug use fell by half. Source: Forbes. Turns out when you spend money actually trying to help people, instead of paying to lock them in holes, people start to get better.

Imagine how much taxpayer money would be freed up if we were only paying to incarcerate half of the current population for drugs. Wikipedia says "Perhaps the single greatest force behind the growth of the prison population has been the national war on drugs.The number of incarcerated drug offenders has increased twelvefold since 1980. In 2000, 22 percent of those in federal and state prisons were convicted on drug charges." Do away with the way on drugs mentality that packs prisoners into convict college at taxpayer expense, and start helping people with their problems at a fundamental level.

It would be interesting to see what would happen in Mexico if we decided to legalize and localize our drug production. The current clown show between wannabe Tony Montanas would cease to exist, or exist on a much smaller level. Id imagine a probable uptake in fraud and other type crimes as they scramble in a futile attempt to regain lost revenue, ...


Your "fact" is mere opinion. Why should we accept your premise that legality has no effect on the rates of drug usage?

31 Dec 2012 01:24 AM
Brainsick     
What a "Mexican" Pokemon may look like

May I present...LUDICOLO!!
images1.wikia.nocookie.netView Full Size



/He's no Jynx, though...
cdn.bulbagarden.netView Full Size

31 Dec 2012 01:40 AM
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