One little, two little... ah, nevermind

They darker than we are.

Sorry, the mountain of Derp spewed by Farkers makes all others pale in comparison.

FTA: "Under forfeiture allegations contained in the indictments, Steven Thomas, if convicted, faces forfeiture of $739,744, while Michael Thomas, if convicted, must forfeit $102,393 and two personal computers."

And who gets to keep the "forfeited" money? The Feds?


Also: "stealing from an Indian tribal organization"  is one crime, while "stealing from an Indian tribal government receiving federal funds" is a separate crime?

Those two look like they're from the Wannabe tribe.

Amos Quito: FTA: "Under forfeiture allegations contained in the indictments, Steven Thomas, if convicted, faces forfeiture of $739,744, while Michael Thomas, if convicted, must forfeit $102,393 and two personal computers."

And who gets to keep the "forfeited" money? The Feds?


Also: "stealing from an Indian tribal organization"  is one crime, while "stealing from an Indian tribal government receiving federal funds" is a separate crime?

So if someone robs a person collecting social security...

800k$? Ok, it may be time for me to see what I can qualify for with my barely measureable percentage of Indian heritage.

/Somehow, Suncloud Casino doesn't inspire visions of great wealth tho

There were some men from Mashantucket / With $800K in their bucket / The FBI came / To ruin their game And left a big stain

ftfy

As a longtime resident of the area none of this surprises me.

Superb headline. I presume Maxx Large is subby?

So it's ok for the Indians to steal from me when I go to Foxwoods and play their crooked card games, but not the other way around? I'm tellin' ya.....

Ya know, It'd be nice if proscutors would stick to one crime, instead of piling up a whole of indictments to see which ones stick. And one act shouldn't cause three crimes, that asinine.

It only took one three-year term to get the feds attention? And the rubes still elected him again? Drop the case, the tribe deserves him.

Oh...Quinault Beach Casino, FTW

Rufus Lee King: A man from Provincetown, Mass,
Had testicles made out of brass.
He banged them together,
To play "Stormy Weather",
And lightning shot out of his ass.

/apologies to Shary Flenniken fans
//couldn't find the original drawings
///would have gotten me a ban, anyways

A habit both vile and unsavory
Kept the bishop of London in slavery
With lecherous howls
He deflowered owls
Which he kept in an underground aviary

/ I can keep going all night. Bring 'em on, Asimov. ;)

There once was a man from Boston
who drove around in an Austin
with room for his ass and a gallon of gas
but his ball$ dragged out and he lost'em

There was a young man from Bay
who thought that the clap went away
now he has scabies
and brand-legged babies
and thinks he's the queen of the May.

Ihazabucket would be a good name for a small fishing port in New England.

There once was a man from Ballpeen
who invented a whackoff machine
He stuck in his wang the machine went bang
and whipped his ball$ to cream

There once was a thread on Fark
Where limericks were posted for a lark
And the more that I read
I now must concede
You Farkers have turned this to art!