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   Guy Fieri's new wine is quizzical, yet decisive, with a piquant nose redolent of Rohypnol, in-mouth notes of Axe Body Spray, and an exuberant finish of Zubaz stained with tanning oil and sack sweat

28 Jan 2013 04:52 PM   |   12436 clicks   |   Santa Rosa Press Democrat
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Lt. Cheese Weasel    [TotalFark]  
www.eymetwines.com

'Ah yes, Resplendent in it's after notes of douchebag, attention whore and feckless bordedom.'

28 Jan 2013 03:03 PM
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MaudlinMutantMollusk    [TotalFark]  
I'll be glad when that porcupine's 15 minutes is up

28 Jan 2013 03:15 PM
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Cythraul     

MaudlinMutantMollusk: I'll be glad when that porcupine's 15 minutes is up


I'm sure Food Network will just find another way to re-package him for the masses.

28 Jan 2013 03:42 PM
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Nabb1    [TotalFark]  

28 Jan 2013 03:53 PM
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Triumph    [TotalFark]  
Smores Pizza Sauvingnon Blanc.

28 Jan 2013 03:58 PM
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sno man    [TotalFark]  

Cythraul: MaudlinMutantMollusk: I'll be glad when that porcupine's 15 minutes is up

I'm sure Food Network will just find another way to re-package him for the masses.


Or they'll just get a new more vapid personality with even less actual food skills.  Guy makes me miss Bobby Flay and that makes me angry because I really disliked Bobby Flay.

28 Jan 2013 04:05 PM
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Cythraul     

sno man: Cythraul: MaudlinMutantMollusk: I'll be glad when that porcupine's 15 minutes is up

I'm sure Food Network will just find another way to re-package him for the masses.

Or they'll just get a new more vapid personality with even less actual food skills.  Guy makes me miss Bobby Flay and that makes me angry because I really disliked Bobby Flay.


I completely tuned out after Good Eats was cancelled. But it's been clear for a long time that Food Network has been transforming itself into the MTV of food.

28 Jan 2013 04:10 PM
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UberDave    [TotalFark]  

sno man: Cythraul: MaudlinMutantMollusk: I'll be glad when that porcupine's 15 minutes is up

I'm sure Food Network will just find another way to re-package him for the masses.

Or they'll just get a new more vapid personality with even less actual food skills.  Guy makes me miss Bobby Flay and that makes me angry because I really disliked Bobby Flay.



I think if Chairman Kaga had encouraged chef Morimoto to karate Bobby Flay's nards with a tenderizing mallet it would have made for the most watched entertainment in Food Network history...

28 Jan 2013 04:12 PM
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sno man    [TotalFark]  
On topic, it's only 5 acres, he can't do too much damage.

28 Jan 2013 04:18 PM
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sno man    [TotalFark]  

Cythraul: sno man: Cythraul: MaudlinMutantMollusk: I'll be glad when that porcupine's 15 minutes is up

I'm sure Food Network will just find another way to re-package him for the masses.

Or they'll just get a new more vapid personality with even less actual food skills.  Guy makes me miss Bobby Flay and that makes me angry because I really disliked Bobby Flay.

I completely tuned out after Good Eats was cancelled. But it's been clear for a long time that Food Network has been transforming itself into the MTV of food.


Here too... It rarely gets landed on on the troll through that tier of the cable.  The same dumbing down thing is happening to all the channels and it's getting really hard to justify that whole cable block.  Half the channels change their name once or twice a year, and all the shows are one of three themes.

28 Jan 2013 04:29 PM
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sno man    [TotalFark]  

UberDave: sno man: Cythraul: MaudlinMutantMollusk: I'll be glad when that porcupine's 15 minutes is up

I'm sure Food Network will just find another way to re-package him for the masses.

Or they'll just get a new more vapid personality with even less actual food skills.  Guy makes me miss Bobby Flay and that makes me angry because I really disliked Bobby Flay.


I think if Chairman Kaga had encouraged chef Morimoto to karate Bobby Flay's nards with a tenderizing mallet it would have made for the most watched entertainment in Food Network history...


I'd watch that on Pay-per-View.

28 Jan 2013 04:30 PM
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Coco LaFemme     
Food Network has too many gimmicky shows, with hosts that overact.  I was channel surfing a couple of days ago and saw this program, I think it's called Sugar Dome or something retarded like that, and the host came out and with really dramatic lighting/sound, these jars descended from the ceiling.....it was too much.  I started laughing so hard I nearly blacked out.

28 Jan 2013 04:32 PM
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The_Sponge    [TotalFark]  
And it only comes in the 1997 vintage, because Guy is permanently stuck in that year.

28 Jan 2013 04:33 PM
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Ed Finnerty     
I noticed his BBQ sauce while shopping this weekend. I noticed it and giggled as I walked on by.

28 Jan 2013 04:48 PM
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vernonFL    [TotalFark]  
I normally don't buy "celebrity" wines, but the AC/DC wine isn't bad.


encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com

28 Jan 2013 04:52 PM
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Infobahn     
How many of you Guy haters have actually eaten his food? That's what I thought.

28 Jan 2013 04:57 PM
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angry_scientist     

vernonFL: I normally don't buy "celebrity" wines, but the AC/DC wine isn't bad.


[encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com image 199x253]


well it is for upper upper class high society...

28 Jan 2013 04:57 PM
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BronyMedic     

vernonFL: I normally don't buy "celebrity" wines, but the AC/DC wine isn't bad.


[encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com image 199x253]


Yeah, but AC/DC jumped the shark years ago when they decided wearing women's platform heels, latex bondage gear, and painting their faces white and black wasn't gouche.

28 Jan 2013 04:57 PM
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sigdiamond2000    [TotalFark]  

vernonFL: I normally don't buy "celebrity" wines, but the AC/DC wine isn't bad.


I only buy AC/DC wine that was bottled during the Bon Scott era. The stuff released since 1980 is a bland, lifeless imitation that's more style over substance.

28 Jan 2013 04:57 PM
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Ernie the Fork     
I think Fark needs to give this guy more free PR. Him and Paris, and Kim K, and Honey Douche Douche.

28 Jan 2013 04:57 PM
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Well I use Mac/Linux...     
He's bad, but he's still better than Bourdain.

28 Jan 2013 05:00 PM
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blatz514    [TotalFark]  
Best wine EVar!

1.bp.blogspot.com

28 Jan 2013 05:00 PM
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tricycleracer     

Well I use Mac/Linux...: He's bad, but he's still better than Bourdain.


Bourdain was actually a working chef.  Guy Fieri was never a chef anywhere.

Although Fieri has no training as a chef, he worked at restaurants during high school and then managed and owned restaurants.

28 Jan 2013 05:00 PM
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sigdiamond2000    [TotalFark]  

Infobahn: How many of you Guy haters have actually eaten his food? That's what I thought.


He's not going to give you a ride in his Camaro, dude.

28 Jan 2013 05:01 PM
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Gilligann     
Slimy, yet satisfying

/hakuna matata

28 Jan 2013 05:02 PM
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LeroyBourne     
It compliments this 'dump' sauce very well.

28 Jan 2013 05:03 PM
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jj325    [TotalFark]  
Does this replace his old whine about the terrible reviews his restaurant got?

28 Jan 2013 05:03 PM
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The_Sponge    [TotalFark]  

vernonFL: I normally don't buy "celebrity" wines, but the AC/DC wine isn't bad.


[encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com image 199x253]



SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY!!!

/Heard about it before.
//Just haven't seen it in local stores.

28 Jan 2013 05:03 PM
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wambu     
So for wine, that's good, right?

28 Jan 2013 05:04 PM
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The_Sponge    [TotalFark]  

sigdiamond2000: vernonFL: I normally don't buy "celebrity" wines, but the AC/DC wine isn't bad.

I only buy AC/DC wine that was bottled during the Bon Scott era. The stuff released since 1980 is a bland, lifeless imitation that's more style over substance.



Ever had the stuff from the Dave Evans era?  I wouldn't even give it to the winos in Pioneer Square.

28 Jan 2013 05:05 PM
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berylman     
I am not here to defend Guy but I actually think his show Diners and Drives does a decent job of showcasing smaller establishments that would likely be overlooked by critics. It seems to focus more on the food itself than the personality of the host which is fine by me.

28 Jan 2013 05:05 PM
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Mirrorz    [TotalFark]  
www.charliekilo.com

28 Jan 2013 05:05 PM
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The_Sponge    [TotalFark]  

Mirrorz: [www.charliekilo.com image 719x553]



He shoots he scores!

28 Jan 2013 05:07 PM
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Psycoholic_Slag     

sigdiamond2000: vernonFL: I normally don't buy "celebrity" wines, but the AC/DC wine isn't bad.

I only buy AC/DC wine that was bottled during the Bon Scott era. The stuff released since 1980 is a bland, lifeless imitation that's more style over substance.


You sir, are awesome.

28 Jan 2013 05:08 PM
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TheShavingofOccam123    [TotalFark]  

sno man: Cythraul: MaudlinMutantMollusk: I'll be glad when that porcupine's 15 minutes is up

I'm sure Food Network will just find another way to re-package him for the masses.

Or they'll just get a new more vapid personality with even less actual food skills.  Guy makes me miss Bobby Flay and that makes me angry because I really disliked Bobby Flay.


I like Jacques Pepin. He can debone a chicken in no time at all. Bourdain has him on video. Some other Farker pointed the video out.

28 Jan 2013 05:08 PM
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tlchwi02     
meh, looks like he just bought a small vineyard that was already functioning so he can play rich guy winemaker and write off parties on the property as business expenses on his tax return

28 Jan 2013 05:09 PM
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WMCB     

sno man: On topic, it's only 5 acres, he can't do too much damage.


Five acres is enough to produce a a pretty sizable vintage, and the flavor of Russian River grapes is subtle enough that even the douchiest of douches will find it effective at wooing undergrads and hipster chicks.

Ooh, you have the new Guy Fieri Pinot! It pairs so well with your hot ham and cheese! Do me now!

28 Jan 2013 05:13 PM
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Infobahn     

tlchwi02: meh, looks like he just bought a small vineyard that was already functioning so he can play rich guy winemaker and write off parties on the property as business expenses on his tax return


NTTAWWT

28 Jan 2013 05:14 PM
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js34603     
Oh good it's been almost a week since we had a Guy Fieri hate thread.

Thank god and/or Fark moderators for an outlet for all out impotent hate.

28 Jan 2013 05:14 PM
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wingnut396     
I had a glass of that brew and let me tell you its off the hook! That taste there will drive you straight to downtown wine town. Its just pops that much, for real. And for the final kicker, its totally organic. So for rock star vino at rock bottom pricing, pick up this bad mamma-jamma.

28 Jan 2013 05:14 PM
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born_yesterday     

wingnut396: I had a glass of that brew and let me tell you its off the hook! That taste there will drive you straight to downtown wine town. Its just pops that much, for real. And for the final kicker, its totally organic. So for rock star vino at rock bottom pricing, pick up this bad mamma-jamma.


Now his voice is in my head, you bastard!!!!

28 Jan 2013 05:17 PM
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blottoman     
I say he should open a hunting range, instead of:

"Our son's names are Hunter and Ryder, so we'd call it the 'Hunt and Ryde,'" Fieri said.

How's Stalk & Walk?

28 Jan 2013 05:17 PM
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Rapmaster2000     

wingnut396: I had a glass of that brew and let me tell you its off the hook! That taste there will drive you straight to downtown wine town. Its just pops that much, for real. And for the final kicker, its totally organic. So for rock star vino at rock bottom pricing, pick up this bad mamma-jamma.


BOLD FLAVORS!

28 Jan 2013 05:17 PM
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Lem Motlow     

tricycleracer: Well I use Mac/Linux...: He's bad, but he's still better than Bourdain.

Bourdain was actually a working chef.  Guy Fieri was never a chef anywhere.

Although Fieri has no training as a chef, he worked at restaurants during high school and then managed and owned restaurants.


I don't recall Guy ever claiming to be a professional chef.

28 Jan 2013 05:17 PM
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Psycoholic_Slag     

js34603: Oh good it's been almost a week since we had a Guy Fieri hate thread.

Thank god and/or Fark moderators for an outlet for all out impotent hate.


Quit liking what I hate.

28 Jan 2013 05:18 PM
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TheShavingofOccam123    [TotalFark]  

js34603: Oh good it's been almost a week since we had a Guy Fieri hate thread.

Thank god and/or Fark moderators for an outlet for all out impotent hate.


I miss the Jay Leno hate threads. Guy Fieri never hid behind Anthony Bourdain's sous vide machine.

28 Jan 2013 05:18 PM
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JuicePats    [TotalFark]  
Christ, I originally read that as "Guy Fieri's new wife"

28 Jan 2013 05:18 PM
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Infobahn     

sigdiamond2000: Infobahn: How many of you Guy haters have actually eaten his food? That's what I thought.

He's not going to give you a ride in his Camaro, dude.


Sure, I know that. I have met him twice, first in the first few weeks of season one, and he was just happy to be recognized. Very nice, introduced me to the whole crew, at 5 am, at the Oakland Airport departures curb. Second was in his place in Roseville. Great Buffalo Meat Loaf, and took the time to talk to everyone. Could I do without the bleach hair and tattoos? Sure, but he was nice, chatty, pleasant and polite.

28 Jan 2013 05:18 PM
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WMCB     
Problem is that it'll just clog up the already full over-priced California hyped wine market even further. I'll keep my box wine, thanks.

28 Jan 2013 05:21 PM
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myrrh     
...but what about mouthfeel?

/mouthfeel

28 Jan 2013 05:21 PM
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