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   Not to worry, but the latest viral infection is spread by bite from microscopic mites. Oh, there's no vaccine and it's now fatal? Actually EVERYBODY PANIC

31 Jan 2013 01:01 PM   |   16729 clicks   |   Japan Times
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simplicimus     
It's only a mite fatal.

31 Jan 2013 11:43 AM
Tr0mBoNe    [TotalFark]  
12% mortality rate...

31 Jan 2013 11:54 AM
BKITU    [TotalFark]  
Is a man in Brazil coughing, yet?

31 Jan 2013 12:19 PM
Amos Quito     
"the new viral infection, called severe fever with thrombocytopenia syndrome"
 
I refuse to panic until they come up with a better name for this pandemic.

31 Jan 2013 12:32 PM
Zombie DJ     
The syndrome - characterized by symptoms such as nausea, depletion of blood platelets, a fall in appetite and headaches - can also be transmitted through contact with a victim's blood and bodily fluids.

So I should stop getting pee'd on by Asian hookers?

31 Jan 2013 12:33 PM
Tr0mBoNe    [TotalFark]  

Zombie DJ: The syndrome - characterized by symptoms such as nausea, depletion of blood platelets, a fall in appetite and headaches - can also be transmitted through contact with a victim's blood and bodily fluids.

So I should stop getting pee'd on by Asian hookers?


If that's the price we have to pay then it's not worth it.

31 Jan 2013 12:46 PM
give me doughnuts     
There is only an 88% chance of survival if you happen to get bitten by the mites and then happen to develop severe enough symptoms.

Oh, horrors. We're doomed.

31 Jan 2013 01:00 PM
The Angry Hand of God     

BKITU: Is a man in Brazil coughing, yet?


SHUT DOWN EVERYTHING.

31 Jan 2013 01:02 PM
Nurglitch     
When in panic, when in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout.

Maybe also put a bag over your head. It might help.

31 Jan 2013 01:04 PM
Alebak     

Amos Quito: "the new viral infection, called severe fever with thrombocytopenia syndrome"
 
I refuse to panic until they come up with a better name for this pandemic.


DEATH BLENDER FEVER

31 Jan 2013 01:05 PM
xanadian    [TotalFark]  

Alebak: Amos Quito: "the new viral infection, called severe fever with thrombocytopenia syndrome"
 
I refuse to panic until they come up with a better name for this pandemic.

DEATH BLENDER FEVER


At least it's not Saturday Night Fever:  the musculo-neurological syndrome where a patient has to "boogie" and ends up dancing to death.

31 Jan 2013 01:09 PM
mekki     
Somewhere the Black Plague is scoffing, "Amateur."

31 Jan 2013 01:10 PM
deanis     
Nothing can live in my alcohol stream. Not even the arsehole viral infections.

31 Jan 2013 01:10 PM
dr.zaeus     
comicbook.comView Full Size

31 Jan 2013 01:10 PM
xanadian    [TotalFark]  

The Angry Hand of God: BKITU: Is a man in Brazil coughing, yet?

SHUT DOWN EVERYTHING.


i249.photobucket.comView Full Size

31 Jan 2013 01:11 PM
Alebak     

xanadian: Alebak: Amos Quito: "the new viral infection, called severe fever with thrombocytopenia syndrome"
 
I refuse to panic until they come up with a better name for this pandemic.

DEATH BLENDER FEVER

At least it's not Saturday Night Fever:  the musculo-neurological syndrome where a patient has to "boogie" and ends up dancing to death.


True facts: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dancing_ Plague_of_1518 that was actually a thing that already happened

31 Jan 2013 01:11 PM
deanis     

Amos Quito: "the new viral infection, called severe fever with thrombocytopenia syndrome"
 
I refuse to panic until they come up with a better name for this pandemic.


throbbing peni what?

31 Jan 2013 01:11 PM
carrion_luggage     
images.wikia.comView Full Size


DYIN' O' MITES!

31 Jan 2013 01:12 PM
neversubmit     

mekki: Somewhere the Black Plague is scoffing, "Amateur."


BP had a lot of help from poor hygiene and even poorer diet.

31 Jan 2013 01:14 PM
bikerbob59     
It's in Japan for Christ sakes.  How the hell is it going to get to the Americas?  Swim???

31 Jan 2013 01:16 PM
wraithmare     

bikerbob59: It's in Japan for Christ sakes.  How the hell is it going to get to the Americas?  Swim???


Your phone is ringing. It's IN THE HOUSE!

31 Jan 2013 01:19 PM
hobnail     

bikerbob59: It's in Japan for Christ sakes.  How the hell is it going to get to the Americas?  Swim???


lh6.ggpht.comView Full Size

/hot

31 Jan 2013 01:21 PM
WordsnCollision     
Thank God they're not antisem mites.

/Rabid antisem mites at that.

31 Jan 2013 01:28 PM
devilEther     

Zombie DJ: The syndrome - characterized by symptoms such as nausea, depletion of blood platelets, a fall in appetite and headaches - can also be transmitted through contact with a victim's blood and bodily fluids.

So I should stop getting pee'd on by Asian hookers?


that's so weird, just a moment ago i was sitting here at work daydreaming about the last time I did that.

/you think i'm kidding

31 Jan 2013 01:29 PM
minoridiot     
Sounds like they are describing Dengue fever.  I'm guessing that was lost in the translation.

31 Jan 2013 01:35 PM
Sir Not Sure The Unscannable     
I will panic as soon as Madagascar closes its port.

31 Jan 2013 01:44 PM
Jackpot777     
Dyin' o' m...

carrion_luggage: [images.wikia.com image 180x244]

DYIN' O' MITES!


God damn it!

31 Jan 2013 01:47 PM
JuggleGeek     
We must be allowed to defend ourselves.  Microscopic guns for everybody!

31 Jan 2013 01:53 PM
Aquapope     
FTFA: Genetic studies show the virus that killed the Japanese occurred in Japan...

Oh my God! The Japanese are dead!!! Why didn't this make bigger news? This will play hell on Asian markets? Where will we get our cars? Of course it occurred in Japan - if you're a virus bent on killing the Japanese, where you gonna go? Detroit?

31 Jan 2013 01:56 PM
WeenerGord     

xanadian: At least it's not Saturday Night Fever:  the musculo-neurological syndrome where a patient has to "boogie" and ends up dancing to death.



I can't stop my leg!

31 Jan 2013 02:00 PM
CygnusDarius     

hobnail: bikerbob59: It's in Japan for Christ sakes.  How the hell is it going to get to the Americas?  Swim???

[lh6.ggpht.com image 800x305]
/hot


I knew Pokemon was evil, never did I thought they were also disease carriers.

31 Jan 2013 02:00 PM
ringersol     
neversubmit: "BP had a lot of help from poor hygiene and even poorer diet. "

And this new thing has 12% mortality *in China*.
So it's not like it's being held down by first-world medicine.

/ I'm sure China has some great hospitals
// I'm just also sure that not many Chinese have access to them

31 Jan 2013 02:01 PM
Rhypskallion     
One person in Japan, died because of an unusual virus never seen before in Japan?
Sounds like...ninjas.

31 Jan 2013 02:04 PM
CygnusDarius     

Rhypskallion: One person in Japan, died because of an unusual virus never seen before in Japan?
Sounds like...ninjas.


Mite ninjas?.

31 Jan 2013 02:05 PM
MrHappyRotter     

Aquapope: FTFA: Genetic studies show the virus that killed the Japanese occurred in Japan...

Oh my God! The Japanese are dead!!! Why didn't this make bigger news? This will play hell on Asian markets? Where will we get our cars? Of course it occurred in Japan - if you're a virus bent on killing the Japanese, where you gonna go? Detroit?


If all of the Japanese are dead, who will the octopi and ghosts and robots rape now?

31 Jan 2013 02:08 PM
DysphoricMania     

CygnusDarius: Rhypskallion: One person in Japan, died because of an unusual virus never seen before in Japan?
Sounds like...ninjas.

Mite ninjas?.


Mite be

31 Jan 2013 02:12 PM
Badgers     
sd.keepcalm-o-matic.co.ukView Full Size

31 Jan 2013 02:14 PM
BKITU    [TotalFark]  

WeenerGord: xanadian: At least it's not Saturday Night Fever:  the musculo-neurological syndrome where a patient has to "boogie" and ends up dancing to death.


I can't stop my leg!


You.

I like you.

You can stay on my lawn.

31 Jan 2013 02:26 PM
WeenerGord     

CygnusDarius: Rhypskallion: One person in Japan, died because of an unusual virus never seen before in Japan?
Sounds like...ninjas.

Mite ninjas?.


media-cache-lt0.pinterest.comView Full Size

31 Jan 2013 02:43 PM
mama2tnt     

Alebak: Amos Quito: "the new viral infection, called severe fever with thrombocytopenia syndrome"
 
I refuse to panic until they come up with a better name for this pandemic.

DEATH BLENDER FEVER


That's a great name for a band.

31 Jan 2013 02:47 PM
upndn     
A good thread full of funny is always good.

31 Jan 2013 02:49 PM
neversubmit     

ringersol: neversubmit: "BP had a lot of help from poor hygiene and even poorer diet. "

And this new thing has 12% mortality *in China*.
So it's not like it's being held down by first-world medicine.

/ I'm sure China has some great hospitals
// I'm just also sure that not many Chinese have access to them


All good points however

FTFA: Genetic studies show the virus that killed the Japanese occurred in Japan and did not come from China, the ministry said.

now back to China. China has a major pollution problems, sort of parallel to hygiene problems of medieval europe it you will. There could be a pollutant(s) that trolls the immune system.

31 Jan 2013 02:51 PM
WeenerGord     

BKITU: WeenerGord: xanadian: At least it's not Saturday Night Fever:  the musculo-neurological syndrome where a patient has to "boogie" and ends up dancing to death.


I can't stop my leg!

You.

I like you.

You can stay on my lawn.


www.wallpaperpimper.comView Full Size


There it goes again!

31 Jan 2013 02:52 PM
Fark Rye For Many Whores     
can also be transmitted through contact with a victim's blood and bodily fluids.

This appears to be horseshiat. http://www.nejm.org/doi/full/10.1056/ NEJMoa1010095 says:

The viruses in the ticks were isolated in Vero cell culture, and the RNA sequences of these viruses were very closely related but not identical to the SFTSV isolated in samples obtained from the patients (data not shown). There was no epidemiologic evidence of human-to-human transmission of the virus.

31 Jan 2013 02:52 PM
Medic Zero     

Amos Quito: "the new viral infection, called severe fever with thrombocytopenia syndrome"
 
I refuse to panic until they come up with a better name for this pandemic.


Mitey Virus?

Not as good as Monkey Pox, to be sure...

31 Jan 2013 02:59 PM
Send More Chuck Berry     

give me doughnuts: There is only an 88% chance of survival if you happen to get bitten by the mites and then happen to develop severe enough symptoms.


southparkstudios.mtvnimages.comView Full Size

We'll need a spirit journey

31 Jan 2013 03:04 PM
The Angry Hand of God     

Medic Zero: Amos Quito: "the new viral infection, called severe fever with thrombocytopenia syndrome"
 
I refuse to panic until they come up with a better name for this pandemic.

Mitey Virus?

Not as good as Monkey Pox, to be sure...


RIP.

www.exglam.comView Full Size

31 Jan 2013 03:06 PM
jvl     

Tr0mBoNe: 12%


So roughly the same as Russian Roulette (16%).

31 Jan 2013 03:14 PM
ringersol     
neversubmit: "All good points however"

Yes, the Japanese man did not die from a strain that could be traced to China.
That, however, does not mean it's necessarily materially different.
The same evidence that ruled out a direct path seems to stand in support of it being effectively the same disease in both places.

And if it's only at 12% with the benefit of bad conditions, it's still fair below the bubonic plague, which is still at 30+% despite modern medicine (and up to 80% in bad conditions).

31 Jan 2013 03:30 PM
Medic Zero     

The Angry Hand of God: Medic Zero: Amos Quito: "the new viral infection, called severe fever with thrombocytopenia syndrome"
 
I refuse to panic until they come up with a better name for this pandemic.

Mitey Virus?

Not as good as Monkey Pox, to be sure...

RIP.

[www.exglam.com image 850x1026]


Nice! I lol'd. Perhaps the beginning of a new meme?

31 Jan 2013 03:31 PM
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