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   You are an officer on a Canadian Navy Ship and your wife cheats on you. Do you: 1) Divorce her, 2) Suck it up, or 3) Sell allied intelligence secrets to Russia

02 Feb 2013 11:40 AM   |   4762 clicks   |   CTV News
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Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener     
img543.imageshack.us

Option 4: take Remedial English again and hope for a miracle.

02 Feb 2013 07:41 AM
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edmo    [TotalFark]  
Well he showed her, eh?

02 Feb 2013 07:43 AM
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log_jammin     
A Navy officer and you're surprised at your wife's infidelity???

02 Feb 2013 08:29 AM
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Mugato    [TotalFark]  
Navy? I would guess (2.

Thank you! Goodnight!

02 Feb 2013 08:33 AM
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BronyMedic     
Jesus, Submitter. Are you a Russian Spy?

img2.timeinc.net

02 Feb 2013 09:17 AM
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rev. dave     
When you are cheated on, it can affect the logic part of your brain.   Most likely, if you love someone that much, the other person does not feel the same way.

02 Feb 2013 09:37 AM
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texdent    [TotalFark]  
What a Russian spy might look like
static7.businessinsider.com

02 Feb 2013 10:14 AM
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SnarfVader     
Well, there goes our strategic maple reserves.

/Heading out the door to stock up.

02 Feb 2013 10:21 AM
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Mugato    [TotalFark]  

texdent: What a Russian spy might look like
[static7.businessinsider.com image 400x300]


static2.businessinsider.com

02 Feb 2013 10:44 AM
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Ghastly    [TotalFark]  
Navy? If I'm in the Navy then I'm too busy having hot gay sex to care about the biatch.

/Artillery
//gay
///didn't get any damned hot gay sex in the Artillery

02 Feb 2013 11:23 AM
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Yakk     
Canadian Navy secrets? And someone wanted to buy them?

02 Feb 2013 11:45 AM
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JerkStore     
So they're now deciding his punishment--9 years or 25 years. He should be farking glad he's not an American. Isn't treason punishable by death?

And selling out your country for $72,000? I don't know what my price would be, but it'll have at least two more zeros attached to it.

02 Feb 2013 11:45 AM
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legion_of_doo     
So, which end of the canoe has the torpedos?

And which submarine isn't on fire?

02 Feb 2013 11:47 AM
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grokca    [TotalFark]  
Oh great, now the Russians know where all the Timmys are.

02 Feb 2013 11:50 AM
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stuffy     
In other news. The Canadian Navy has secrets.

02 Feb 2013 11:52 AM
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EngineerBob     
There goes the Poutine defense shield...

02 Feb 2013 11:53 AM
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Forbidden Doughnut    [TotalFark]  

JerkStore: So they're now deciding his punishment--9 years or 25 years. He should be farking glad he's not an American. Isn't treason punishable by death?

And selling out your country for $72,000? I don't know what my price would be, but it'll have at least two more zeros attached to it.


In the US, even if you spy for an "ally" like Israel, you get put in prison for decades...

/ Pollard get released in 2015..

02 Feb 2013 11:53 AM
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BahdaBoom     
2.bp.blogspot.com

oh jeez the secret is out, eh?

02 Feb 2013 11:54 AM
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A Terrible Human     

BronyMedic: Jesus, Submitter. Are you a Russian Spy?

[img2.timeinc.net image 510x253]


Jesus,Mary and Joesph Stalin!

02 Feb 2013 12:00 PM
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Nothing To See Here     
" Who ate the frozen strawberries? "

02 Feb 2013 12:02 PM
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Bit'O'Gristle     
Good job, that will teach that biatch that she picked the wrong guy to mess with. What a tool. And really? just 70 K? For passing that much info? Really? Sucker.

02 Feb 2013 12:03 PM
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JonnyBGoode    [TotalFark]  

02 Feb 2013 12:04 PM
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JasonOfOrillia    [TotalFark]  
41 year old sub-lieutenant?  Something tells me his career wasn't working out as well as he'd hoped.

02 Feb 2013 12:04 PM
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Generic Republican     
Sorry Subby,  HMCS Trinity is a shore facility, not a warship.

02 Feb 2013 12:06 PM
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bubo_sibiricus     
If I'm going to be a spy for the Russians, I'm gonna have to have a deal sweeter than a box of Timbits.

1.  Money:  So I can live well.
2.  An escape plan and smuggling me to Mother Russia.
3.  An apartment in St. Petersburg, a nice one.

1 and 2 are non-negotiable

#3 is optional.  Talinn, Estonia is pretty too, and money goes far there.

02 Feb 2013 12:09 PM
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swahnhennessy     
Option 3. But only if his wife is Canada.

02 Feb 2013 12:11 PM
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Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo     
Canadian intelligence?  What, his grandmother's poutine recipe?

02 Feb 2013 12:12 PM
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kombat_unit     
Spies should be executed.

02 Feb 2013 12:13 PM
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Hopjes     
Aren't the countries listed the partners to the UKUSA Security Agreement? Could that facility might be an intercept station?

02 Feb 2013 12:14 PM
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Foundling     
Exactly how much is Russia willing to pay to learn secrets about snow?

02 Feb 2013 12:17 PM
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miniflea     
One of the most interesting parts of the spy museum in DC was the wall that listed people who were caught selling information, how much they were paid and what the motivation for spying was. In many cases it seemed to take surprisingly little to make someone turn traitor.

02 Feb 2013 12:19 PM
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Foundling     

Ghastly: Navy? If I'm in the Navy then I'm too busy having hot gay sex to care about the biatch.

/Artillery
//gay
///didn't get any damned hot gay sex in the Artillery


Ten year navy vet.
Married for ten years afterwards.
Came out as gay after divorce.
Co-worker: "You Navy guys in Yokosuka were shameless! Huge orgies!"
Me: "Nobody told me about it!"

02 Feb 2013 12:20 PM
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Nothing To See Here     
I'm guessing he wasn't the Falcon . . .

www.freecodesource.com

02 Feb 2013 12:23 PM
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Rozinante     

Yakk: Canadian Navy secrets? And someone wanted to buy them?


stuffy: In other news. The Canadian Navy has secrets.


These were some pretty high level secrets. LIke from all of NATO. Like from the US too. The world intelligence community shiat themselves when this came out (months ago). A lot of people left other countries in the middle of the night.

02 Feb 2013 12:39 PM
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Rozinante     

Foundling: Exactly how much is Russia willing to pay to learn secrets about snow?


A few grand a month. Not really worth it.

02 Feb 2013 12:40 PM
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cleveoh     

SnarfVader: Well, there goes our strategic maple reserves.

/Heading out the door to stock up.


The bastard sold the Smarties formula!  Hangin's too good...

02 Feb 2013 12:46 PM
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Pribar    [TotalFark]  
or 4) "accidentally" list her apartments coordinates as a target on the next live fire exercise

02 Feb 2013 12:46 PM
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Happy Hours     

bubo_sibiricus: If I'm going to be a spy for the Russians, I'm gonna have to have a deal sweeter than a box of Timbits.

1.  Money:  So I can live well.
2.  An escape plan and smuggling me to Mother Russia.
3.  An apartment in St. Petersburg, a nice one.

1 and 2 are non-negotiable

#3 is optional.  Talinn, Estonia is pretty too, and money goes far there.


Yeah, came here to say something similar - $72,000 over 5 years is a pittance.  Hope he blew it all on hookers and blow.

02 Feb 2013 12:48 PM
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Some Junkie Cosmonaut     

JerkStore: So they're now deciding his punishment--9 years or 25 years. He should be farking glad he's not an American. Isn't treason punishable by death?

And selling out your country for $72,000? I don't know what my price would be, but it'll have at least two more zeros attached to it.


Eh... might well make sense under the circumstances.  He could have ended up selling them some pretty lightweight/minor stuff.  From what little I've read about etc. non-fictionwise spy-mastering governments often start with chimpy or minor info to keep the person comfortable with the idea.  "Oh that's hardly important even, we just want to confirm they're using latex paint on outhouses in the field to satisfy the bureaucratic jackarses, we'll pay you just to get them the info so they'll stop bugging us about stupid shiat, comrade." etc.  Even for quite a long time people can be strung along like that, maybe a bit worse as time goes by, but nothing you'd consider seriously useful to an enemy.  Pretty much so they can have that person totally under their thumb when they DO need the serious shiate, and then use the guy for something that really matters - and under the circumstances he'll have done so much bad stuff already his/her choices are usually comply or admit it to their bosses.  Few go the latter route, since the punishments even at their litest are not My Little Pony and cake.

Also need to look at the actual times of offense, and check Canada's "at war" status for those time officially.  Espionage, treason, and sedidtion have evolved as different concepts mostly to describe differences in activities and impact stemming from there being a state of war at the time or not.  Non-officially wartime crimes almost always receive lesser sentences.

Anyway, blah blah blah but yeah - there are more than a few good reasons why the sentence might seem comparitively low to those handed out in the US.  Lastly and not leastly being Canadians are generally at least a wee bit less psycho with their judgements on things.

02 Feb 2013 01:00 PM
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Ghastly    [TotalFark]  

Foundling: Ghastly: Navy? If I'm in the Navy then I'm too busy having hot gay sex to care about the biatch.

/Artillery
//gay
///didn't get any damned hot gay sex in the Artillery

Ten year navy vet.
Married for ten years afterwards.
Came out as gay after divorce.
Co-worker: "You Navy guys in Yokosuka were shameless! Huge orgies!"
Me: "Nobody told me about it!"


They used to always say I had to watch out for gang rape in the showers at CFB Petawawa, yet the entire time I was there nobody so much as pinched my ass. Left me with a horrible Ugly Duck complex "why doesn't anyone want to rape my ass? Am I that hideous and unrapable?"

02 Feb 2013 01:02 PM
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leonel     

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: [img543.imageshack.us image 800x78]

Option 4: take Remedial English again and hope for a miracle.


www.stensones.com

02 Feb 2013 01:09 PM
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rwa2     

log_jammin: A Navy officer and you're surprised at your wife's infidelity???


I always laugh whenever I drive near naval bases and see all of the "Navy Wife" bumper stickers everywhere.

Why don't they just make a "Husband is /deployed/ !" magnet to go along with it?

02 Feb 2013 01:11 PM
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ExcaliburPrime111     
Best quote FTA:

"No disrespect, but I said it before - I don't believe there's too much to be spied out of Canada," [Russian Ambassador to Canada] Mamedov said.

This guy went to the Russian embassy on his own accord.  He passed information to a foreign government for years.  The only thing going for him is his guilty verdict, but he should get the total recommended by the Prosecution of 25 years imprisonment.

02 Feb 2013 01:14 PM
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rikkards     
Generic Republican: Sorry Subby,  HMCS Trinity is a shore facility, not a warship.

It's a ship ... made of cement. Probably has a mast too.

02 Feb 2013 02:28 PM
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Raoul Eaton     

Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Canadian intelligence?  What, his grandmother's poutine recipe?


The combination to the lock safeguarding the national maple syrup reserve.

02 Feb 2013 02:59 PM
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bratface     

Yakk: Canadian Navy secrets? And someone wanted to buy them?


I was just going to post the same thing.

02 Feb 2013 05:39 PM
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Sgt Otter    [TotalFark]  

Ghastly: Navy? If I'm in the Navy then I'm too busy having hot gay sex to care about the biatch.

/Artillery
//gay
///didn't get any damned hot gay sex in the Artillery


I thought the infantry was the Queen of Battle.

02 Feb 2013 06:40 PM
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foxyshadis     

miniflea: One of the most interesting parts of the spy museum in DC was the wall that listed people who were caught selling information, how much they were paid and what the motivation for spying was. In many cases it seemed to take surprisingly little to make someone turn traitor.


Just look at the number of people who get burnt out, hate their job, and start sabotaging or stealing from it in the private and public sector, and consider that it's really no different even in classified side of the military.

03 Feb 2013 06:53 PM
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