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   Hot blonde has this rare form of OCD where she's imagining you naked and yet can keep her lunch down

01 Sep 2013 12:46 AM   |   29120 clicks   |   Guardian
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RodneyToady    [TotalFark]  
Needless to say, I don't feel too "pure" when I've woken every morning for a fortnight to the crystalline thought of assholes.

The life of a proctologist, I imagine.

31 Aug 2013 10:35 PM
doglover    [TotalFark]  
If everyone was naked, like a nude beach, would she imagine them in clothes?

31 Aug 2013 11:39 PM
Twilight Farkle    [TotalFark]  
These are things you're not even supposed to think about, let alone talk about.

dashie.mylittlefacewhen.comView Full Size


give up guacamole for ever

i.imgur.comView Full Size


watched his face melt into a chubby

i.imgur.comView Full Size


At which point the article transcended Rule 34 and became a flat-out challenge of Rule 35, and I'm still laughing.

01 Sep 2013 12:46 AM
Daraymann     
CDO.  It's alphabetical.

01 Sep 2013 01:01 AM
HotWingAgenda    [TotalFark]  
You mentally undress your friends, Tony Blair, the lollipop lady.

That is lazy writing.

cdn.thegloss.comView Full Size

01 Sep 2013 01:01 AM
The Flexecutioner     
gadzooks, she's hot!  that's something like 3 out of the last 20 of the 'smoking hot' headline meme that actually paid off.  well, i guess it didnt actually say smoking, but whatever.

/im picturing her picturing me naked
//poor girl

01 Sep 2013 01:02 AM
chitownmike     

Twilight Farkle: These are things you're not even supposed to think about, let alone talk about.



give up guacamole for ever



watched his face melt into a chubby



At which point the article transcended Rule 34 and became a flat-out challenge of Rule 35, and I'm still laughing.


Bronies do NOT get to call out rule 34 violators!

01 Sep 2013 01:02 AM
MadCat221     

chitownmike: Twilight Farkle: These are things you're not even supposed to think about, let alone talk about.

give up guacamole for ever

watched his face melt into a chubby

At which point the article transcended Rule 34 and became a flat-out challenge of Rule 35, and I'm still laughing.

Bronies do NOT get to call out rule 34 violators!


Neither do bronyhaters who immediately and Freudianly (new word?) equate Bronies with sexual deviants.

01 Sep 2013 01:08 AM
brimed03     
Wow, her eyes... are so much older than the rest of her; they really reflect the years of absolute hell she's endured, as well as the bit of peace she's finally found.

Good find, Subby. Really interesting.

01 Sep 2013 01:10 AM
skinink     
You down with OCD? Yea you know me!

01 Sep 2013 01:12 AM
TomD9938     
FTA : she's imagining you naked and yet can keep her lunch down

Sweet!  No gag reflex.

01 Sep 2013 01:15 AM
peewinkle     
I have an ex that was diagnosed with this.... so she they claimed.  She was good in the sack, until she came at me with a steak knife one night. Well, okay, that was good, too, but I'm not perfect myself.

01 Sep 2013 01:21 AM
lewismarktwo     

MadCat221: chitownmike: Twilight Farkle: These are things you're not even supposed to think about, let alone talk about.

give up guacamole for ever

watched his face melt into a chubby

At which point the article transcended Rule 34 and became a flat-out challenge of Rule 35, and I'm still laughing.

Bronies do NOT get to call out rule 34 violators!

Neither do bronyhaters who immediately and Freudianly (new word?) equate Bronies with sexual deviants.


Hey, let's make this thread about a horse cartoon.  Never seen _that_ happen before...

01 Sep 2013 01:23 AM
eyemarten     
I was really hoping that this would evolve into an interesting thread, not a bronie-fest.

Have had this issue all my life (sans the naked part) and thought that the super extended crazy obsession spikes were something that everyone had too. The article was an eye opener.

01 Sep 2013 01:30 AM
Twilight Farkle    [TotalFark]  

chitownmike: Twilight Farkle:
At which point the article transcended Rule 34 and became a flat-out challenge of Rule 35, and I'm still laughing.

Bronies do NOT get to call out rule 34 violators!


Ah, but who better? I've seen things you people wouldn't believe... but all those moments will be lost in time, like tears of laughter in the rain. It takes a lot to surprise those of us who've spent some time in the sillier corners of the internet and who've stumbled upon some weird things, and yet this article managed to do so with every paragraph.

i.imgur.comView Full Size


Hence the horrifying realiziation that it didn't violate rule 34, it transcended it, bringing rule 35 into play: if porn of it does not exist, someone, somewhere is going to make porn of it. In a less generous universe, the obsessive would have stumbled into the chans, and either realized she was only one or two standard deviations past normalcy, or desensitized herself to the point that further therapy was unnecessary, and we would never have heard a word of it. Instead, we got this article, for which every time I wanted to post "STOPPED READING THERE" there was a reward for scrolling down one more time. Even if it's pure fiction, the author was brilliant with the use of surreal imagery.

01 Sep 2013 01:36 AM
GBmanNC     
"You mentally undress your friends, Tony Blair, the lollipop lady. Your thoughts are X-rated. You wonder if you're a paedophile - or just losing your mind. A sufferer describes the nightmare - and dark comedy - of  living with pure OCD being a man "

Fixed for accuracy.
Well, minus the Tony Blair part.

/not that there's anything wrong with that.

01 Sep 2013 01:37 AM
berylman     
I met Jake Gyllenhallon a music video shoot and watched his face melt into a chubby vagina in my vision.

Wait, that's not normal?

01 Sep 2013 01:37 AM
shtychkn     

lewismarktwo: MadCat221: chitownmike: Twilight Farkle: These are things you're not even supposed to think about, let alone talk about.

give up guacamole for ever

watched his face melt into a chubby

At which point the article transcended Rule 34 and became a flat-out challenge of Rule 35, and I'm still laughing.

Bronies do NOT get to call out rule 34 violators!

Neither do bronyhaters who immediately and Freudianly (new word?) equate Bronies with sexual deviants.

Hey, let's make this thread about a horse cartoon.  Never seen _that_ happen before...


www.myfacewhen.netView Full Size

01 Sep 2013 01:37 AM
Dead for Tax Reasons     
You mentally undress your friends, Tony Blair, the lollipop lady. Your thoughts are X-rated.

so she knows what it is to be a guy, trading julia gillard for tony blair, unless that's what your into

01 Sep 2013 01:38 AM
Gunther     
Goddamn, that sounds like it sucks. Once or twice I've had something similar; an abhorrent reoccurring thought I can't seem to dismiss, but never for more than a few hours. The idea of having it permanently... Eurgh.

01 Sep 2013 01:39 AM
horsecore     
• Rose Bretécher is a pseudonym.

But these pics are TOTALLY me. Pinky swear.

01 Sep 2013 01:40 AM
DOCTORD000M     
For anyone trying to picture what it's like to live with it just imagine this:

theeradicatorreviews.comView Full Size


/buzzkill
//let's get back to the ponies

01 Sep 2013 01:42 AM
Fallout Boy     

eyemarten: I was really hoping that this would evolve into an interesting thread, not a bronie-fest.


They really think they are being cute and interesting. I believe that is the saddest part.

01 Sep 2013 01:53 AM
Cagey B     
She must be a hell of a public speaker.

01 Sep 2013 01:54 AM
brigid     
I have this, along with a bit of the classic OCD behaviours.

It really does feel like someone's jamming spikes into your head. From the inside.

At one point I was seriously considering having myself sterilised because of the pedo fears. It wasn't until I was in my late 20s that a therapist managed to outwit that obsession. From there it started to feel like maybe just maybe I wasn't doomed to become my abuser.

The night I really knew and was able to let go of of that fear for good was when my neighbours started having a drunken brawl in our shared front yard and left their little guy, 3-4 years old tops, sobbing on the landing. And I felt something sort of take charge in my head, some kind of instinct that was stronger than the fear. I talked to him and carried him down the stairs to his mom after the police had taken his dad away. I gave him a stuffed dragon to play with and when his mom tried to give it back I snuck it back onto their doorstep so he could keep it.

I realised that night that a monster would not do something like that. That a vulnerable child was right there in front of me unsupervised and all I wanted to do was dry his little tears.

01 Sep 2013 02:03 AM
swingerofbirches     
Did anyone else assume the picture was a stock photo given that she used a pseudonym?

Which is to say, she may not be a hot blonde . . .

01 Sep 2013 02:05 AM
brobinson2001     
Jesus. I'm drunk as fark, would bag a -100/10 right now, but this girl...I just wanna hug the shiat out of her.

01 Sep 2013 02:07 AM
Coming on a Bicycle     
Seems to be the typical result of a religious upbringing. Imagining all those 'disturbing' things is only disturbing if you find them disturbing. For the rest of us, it's called 'monday and I'm bored'.

01 Sep 2013 02:09 AM
Some Junkie Cosmonaut    [TotalFark]  

Gunther: Goddamn, that sounds like it sucks. Once or twice I've had something similar; an abhorrent reoccurring thought I can't seem to dismiss, but never for more than a few hours. The idea of having it permanently... Eurgh.


Does... very much so.  Not quite to her level but struggled with some similar issues regarding images of stuff that scares me completely out of my farking gourd. and that will NOT leave me the fark alone for hours on end - ever since I had a bad bout of strep and my temp spiked brain-melt levels for a day back in my teens.  It's really pretty unholy messed up, the stuff you are seeing you do NOT want to see, about as much as it's possible to not want to see something.  But you just cannot make that shiat go away, in fact in elaborates on itself and gets worse usually.   Generally when I'm trying to sleep it's the worst, just cause apparently Eris is a biatch like that?  Who knows?  Seriously though, this kind of thing is not only as bad as it sounds, it's far worse.

Sympathy for her indeed, sounds like she has a 24/7 version of what I at least only get about half the time, with some very random periods of either all the time or not at all.  I seriously might well lose my mind if I had to live with this shiat literally every damn minute.  She's got a lot of steel in her to hold up as well as she has.

01 Sep 2013 02:12 AM
Half Right    [TotalFark]  
Wow, subby wasn't lying this time--hottest British chick ever to appear in one of these articles.

Also, best of luck to any of y'all who suffer from the same. The article was also more interesting and thought-provoking than most.

01 Sep 2013 02:13 AM
twat_waffle     
Wait... So having absolutely depraved, disgusting, and/or abhorrent thoughts flicker through your consciousness at random isn't normal? I thought that everyone dealt with that from time to time.

Jesus... I can't afford to go back to therapy.

/I randomly have thoughts of others in sexual situations
//usually it's people I'd rather not think about like that
///also get random thoughts of brutally murdering the shiat out of everyone
////even though I am generally a very passive person

01 Sep 2013 02:17 AM
Some Junkie Cosmonaut    [TotalFark]  

Coming on a Bicycle: Seems to be the typical result of a religious upbringing. Imagining all those 'disturbing' things is only disturbing if you find them disturbing. For the rest of us, it's called 'monday and I'm bored'.


Not so much there two wheels, trust me on this one.  See above if you like for a somewhat further explanation of why I'd know, but take my word on this.  The images you get are not normal daydreams, fantasies, speculations, or even strong visuals that people get sometimes.

They are relentless, insanely detailed, and worst of all specifically images you do not want to see.  I don't mean stuff you're not supposed to want to see but you browse for on the net at 3am with all the doors locked, the windows covered, and behind 7 Boxies.  I mean shiat you DO NOT EVER WANT TO SEE.  AT ALL.  Not even the farked up parts of your brain.

They can't be distracted, they can't be reasoned away, they can't be hidden from - there's no way to get the hell away from them.  They will not live you be until whatever whacko brain damage that brings them into play calms down.

And even that doesn't quite bring home the sheer joy and fun of living with even the smaller piece of this crap I do.  I can't imagine her dancing with the full version - and considering the shiat that does float through my head I'm quite glad of that really.

01 Sep 2013 02:18 AM
twat_waffle     
Just read the whole article. Disregard previous comment.

01 Sep 2013 02:19 AM
sweatybronson     
Interesting.

I've never heard of this, but I believe I have / have had this - in college, went through a phase of a few years where I was constantly seeing everyone around me naked and violently tearing each other apart.  For y'alls sake, I won't get more specific...  I remember staring into the mirror, imagining drilling a hole in my head.  I didnt' want to kill myself - I wanted the thoughts to go away.

Less obtrusively, I'd think about people I loved dying...

In recenter years, the obsessions have largely shifted to more banal things - six or seven years ago, had a coworker who I thought was cool but ended up betraying me (in ways that were I to repeat them would sound not all that bad), and I didn't respond to the situation as well as I thought I should (again, were I to go into details, wouldn't sound bad at all), and I couldn't stop thinking about it for a very long time, like every night before I went to bed.  I couldn't sleep well because of it.   For like a year.

Same with some health issues (and/or imagined health-issues).  There's gotta be a link, or correlation, to hypochondria, I'd think.

The most peaceful times in my life are when I'm obsessed with being hydrated.  A much more pleasant scenario than the Event-Horizoning-of-my-surroundings that happened when I was 20-22ish.

I think beer and porn might help, too.

Got a bit better when I started indulging in that stuff a bit more.  But a few years ago I lost my sense of smell (which is slowly returning) in a freak zinc-ingesting-then-puking-accident, and it's reared its ugly head again (along with the rest of the fallout from that traumatic loss).

I could definitely see this being an under-the-radar thing.  Tinnitus, for instance - there's always a certain amount of ringing/noise in the ears, but if you tag it as a bad thing and obsess about it, it screws you up.

Maybe people with tinnitus are really folks with pure ocd...

01 Sep 2013 02:23 AM
HoratioGates     
Okay, am I the only one who thinks calling it 'Pure O' sounds like drugs or some sort of marketing gimmick?  I don't like my mental illness to sound cute.

I hate exposure.  I really should do it more often.  Right now I can't touch my kitchen counter or living room rug without washing my hands.  I can't touch my bathroom or bedroom rug at all.  I can't clean my toilet without taking two extended showers.  Still, that's better than it used to be.  At one point it would take me as long as 45 minutes to wash my hands after I went to the bathroom.  (I also locked/unlocked the bathroom door, turned the knob, turned off the light and the faucet with my foot so I didn't have to touch it with my hand.)

01 Sep 2013 02:34 AM
Representative of the unwashed masses     
Tl;dr

01 Sep 2013 02:49 AM
kazikian     
"Rose Bretécher is a pseudonym."

ragefaces.s3.amazonaws.comView Full Size

01 Sep 2013 03:00 AM
kazikian     
Although, Jake Gyllenhall's involvement makes perfect sense.

s3.amazonaws.comView Full Size

01 Sep 2013 03:02 AM
bingethinker     
I feel lucky that most of the disgusting and perverted thoughts I have are stuff I like.

01 Sep 2013 03:29 AM
Arthur Jumbles     

Some Junkie Cosmonaut: Coming on a Bicycle: Seems to be the typical result of a religious upbringing. Imagining all those 'disturbing' things is only disturbing if you find them disturbing. For the rest of us, it's called 'monday and I'm bored'.

Not so much there two wheels, trust me on this one.  See above if you like for a somewhat further explanation of why I'd know, but take my word on this.  The images you get are not normal daydreams, fantasies, speculations, or even strong visuals that people get sometimes


I just have a hard time trying to understand what it must be like to "see" images in your head.... I always was a little bit envious that other people apparently can play movies in their head anytime they want..... however..... if you don't have any control over what you "see" then I'm happy not to have a visual imagination.

01 Sep 2013 03:58 AM
sendtodave     
And copious amounts of porn fixed her.

I think her problem is that she too tightly wound to begin with. What if I'm a pedofile, oh no! What if I'm gay, oh no! I'm picturing people naked, oh no! What will people think of me!?

Meh. Who the fark cares?

01 Sep 2013 04:12 AM
sendtodave     

HoratioGates: Okay, am I the only one who thinks calling it 'Pure O' sounds like drugs or some sort of marketing gimmick?  I don't like my mental illness to sound cute.

I hate exposure.  I really should do it more often.  Right now I can't touch my kitchen counter or living room rug without washing my hands.  I can't touch my bathroom or bedroom rug at all.  I can't clean my toilet without taking two extended showers.  Still, that's better than it used to be.  At one point it would take me as long as 45 minutes to wash my hands after I went to the bathroom.  (I also locked/unlocked the bathroom door, turned the knob, turned off the light and the faucet with my foot so I didn't have to touch it with my hand.)


You should go roll around in poop.

01 Sep 2013 04:15 AM
Assimilate This     

Daraymann: CDO.  It's alphabetical.


I have OCO, obsessive compulsive order.  The rest of you are disordered.

01 Sep 2013 04:41 AM
Phil Moskowitz     

MadCat221: Neither do bronyhaters who immediately and Freudianly (new word?) equate Bronies with sexual deviants.


I'll give you a case of beer if you can round up more than a handful of people who don't think those jokers are beyond warped in their sexual landscape.

01 Sep 2013 04:56 AM
trippycrazy12     

sendtodave: And copious amounts of porn fixed her.

I think her problem is that she too tightly wound to begin with. What if I'm a pedofile, oh no! What if I'm gay, oh no! I'm picturing people naked, oh no! What will people think of me!?

Meh. Who the fark cares?


Not that simple. It's more like just really random thoughts pop into your much more than it does for most people due to lack of serotonin. There does not have to be any context. It's almost impossible to stop them without meds and therapy.

01 Sep 2013 05:03 AM
sendtodave     

trippycrazy12: sendtodave: And copious amounts of porn fixed her.

I think her problem is that she too tightly wound to begin with. What if I'm a pedofile, oh no! What if I'm gay, oh no! I'm picturing people naked, oh no! What will people think of me!?

Meh. Who the fark cares?

Not that simple. It's more like just really random thoughts pop into your much more than it does for most people due to lack of serotonin. There does not have to be any context. It's almost impossible to stop them without meds and therapy.


Well, the tone of the article was "I used to think about farking inappropriate things all the time. Then I watched lots of porn. That helped."

Seems the solution is to get over it.

01 Sep 2013 05:13 AM
Jim_Callahan     
This is why it's difficult to say how many people have pure O.

No, it really isn't.  The number of people requiring medication to function normally, plus the same margin for unreported disorders as literally every psych disorder in existence.

The one hard and fast rule of psychiatry is that, if it doesn't impede your ability to function, it's not pathological.  This isn't goddamned rocket science, if you're having repeated thoughts of whatever but you're fine with it and you can still earn a living and hang out with people like everyone else, you don't have a disorder.  You've just got a personal quirk.

trippycrazy12: Not that simple. It's more like just really random thoughts pop into your much more than it does for most people due to lack of serotonin. There does not have to be any context. It's almost impossible to stop them without meds and therapy.


She didn't get actual treatment, though.  Her description of the various treatments she tried can best be summarized as "a bunch of Freudian bullshiat", sparked by a self-diagnosis.  Real-life OCD treatment involves drugs.  Specifically, antidepressants.  It's a specific disease with known chemical components.

If you see an overblown, melodramatic article about life with OCD and ctrl+f "antidepressant" turns up no results, you're (a) actually reading an overblown, melodramatic article about  hypochondria or (b) reading several pages of fabricated attention-whoring bullshiat.  Actually reading this article in full and taking into account that it's in the Guardian reveals it's a bit of both.

01 Sep 2013 06:06 AM
vrgogrl     

Jim_Callahan: This is why it's difficult to say how many people have pure O.

No, it really isn't.  The number of people requiring medication to function normally, plus the same margin for unreported disorders as literally every psych disorder in existence.

The one hard and fast rule of psychiatry is that, if it doesn't impede your ability to function, it's not pathological.  This isn't goddamned rocket science, if you're having repeated thoughts of whatever but you're fine with it and you can still earn a living and hang out with people like everyone else, you don't have a disorder.  You've just got a personal quirk.

trippycrazy12: Not that simple. It's more like just really random thoughts pop into your much more than it does for most people due to lack of serotonin. There does not have to be any context. It's almost impossible to stop them without meds and therapy.

She didn't get actual treatment, though.  Her description of the various treatments she tried can best be summarized as "a bunch of Freudian bullshiat", sparked by a self-diagnosis.  Real-life OCD treatment involves drugs.  Specifically, antidepressants.  It's a specific disease with known chemical components.

If you see an overblown, melodramatic article about life with OCD and ctrl+f "antidepressant" turns up no results, you're (a) actually reading an overblown, melodramatic article about  hypochondria or (b) reading several pages of fabricated attention-whoring bullshiat.  Actually reading this article in full and taking into account that it's in the Guardian reveals it's a bit of both.


I kept waiting for mention of meds in the article.  She talks about overdosing (on what?) but that's it.  OCD is an anxiety disorder.  Cognitive and exposure therapies can help, but until you address the chemical imbalance, success will be limited for most people.

01 Sep 2013 06:19 AM
MayoSlather     

eyemarten: I was really hoping that this would evolve into an interesting thread, not a bronie-fest.

Have had this issue all my life (sans the naked part) and thought that the super extended crazy obsession spikes were something that everyone had too. The article was an eye opener.


I get crazy things popping into my head all the time, it's always something that disgusts me. It's as if I'm testing myself to confirm I'm disgusted so I know I'm not a degenerate. Ironically, the net result is I feel like a degenerate for having the thought at all.

01 Sep 2013 06:40 AM
enderthexenocide     
i cannot be next to a woman without imagining her naked, i simply cannot.  even if she's 15, i think of her naked.  usually i can't help but imagine having sex with almost every woman i meet.  although i do try to avoid imagining sex with the 15 year olds, because you know, they're 15.  but i also frequently imagine killing people, committing other various crimes, etc.  my mind is always running, and not always to friendly places.

but i don't feel any of that reflects badly on me, because i know they are just thoughts.  they aren't obsessions or perversions, they're just thoughts.  i'm always imagining something weird or creative because i'm a creative person, and it would not be far off the mark to say i'm usually lost in my own fantasy world.  but many of my bizarre ideas have developed into stories or novels, since that's my main creative outlet.  that's just the way i am, i'm always imagining weird things and frequently they are sexual or violent in nature.  it doesn't mean i'm a bad person.

01 Sep 2013 07:18 AM
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