Real News. Real Funny.

• Tue October 24, 2017
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• Stephen Hawking farked up the internet  
  

   

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• The president just made his own additions to the constitution  
  

   

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• All those recently caught in a cave-in raise your hand  
  

   

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• Firefox is deporting 80% of its mextensions next month  
  

  (Bleeping Computer)  

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• Nicaragua just signed the Paris Climate Accords, meaning only two countries remain that refuse to sign. One is a violent, divided country where guns are easily accessible and the dictator in charge thrives on hate and discord. The other is Syria  
  

   

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• "I'll have a skull and a few eyeballs with a side of severed fingers". Mmmmm  
  

   

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• Nothing good can happen by slapping the ass of a police horse on active duty  
  

   

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• Bear has surgery to remove massive 3kg tongue, worries he'll no longer be as popular with the lady bears  
  

   

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• Good news ladies: You can put away the tweezers, big eyebrows are back. Emma Watson ecstatic  
  

   

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• Mon October 23, 2017
• Scalpel? Scalpel. Suture? Suture. Flashlight? Flashlight. Batteries?  
  

   

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• It was 50 years ago that Andy Warhol punked the entire state of Oregon  
  

   

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• UAE finally warming up to men touching each other in bars  
  

   

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• Corgi-Con takes over California beach  
  

   

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• Man steals ambulance crashes a few blocks away before rushing into CVS and storming the counter for 'pills'. Witnesses unsure if cops or suspect then said 'tada'  
  

   

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• "When some people mistake Malala for Mia Khalifa"  
  

   

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• Tip: Do not offer to use your semen rag to wipe the vaseline off your driver's license when stopped for speeding wearing nothing but a bikini thong  
  

   

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• GF sets fire to ex's home because if she can't have the teddy bear, then nobody can  
  

   

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• Bahamas resort for obese tourists welcomes guests with meter-wide chairs, reinforced beds, and zero judgment at the pool. It's being hailed as tons of fun  
  

   

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• Drug sniffing dog finds two pounds of meth inside Pound Puppy. Meanwhile, Teddy Ruxpin's drug empire remains out of reach  
  

   

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• Fark NotNewsletter: Fark rules!  
  

   

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