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  • Currently, Mormons believe baptism is necessary for an individual to exit from "Spirit Prison" - a place akin to purgatory in the Catholic Church. Anyone outside the Mormon faith enters Spirit Prison at the time of their death.

    Even Jesus?

    I guess they've probably baptized Him by now.
  • Lionel Mandrake: Currently, Mormons believe baptism is necessary for an individual to exit from "Spirit Prison" - a place akin to purgatory in the Catholic Church. Anyone outside the Mormon faith enters Spirit Prison at the time of their death.

    Even Jesus?

    I guess they've probably baptized Him by now.


    Yes, they have. Jesus is now a Mormon.
  • Vlad the Impaler, you say?

    i226.photobucket.comView Full Size


    "Perhaps now would be a good time to consider praying to your impotent god. Followed by a course of pissing yourself...."
  • Lionel Mandrake: Currently, Mormons believe baptism is necessary for an individual to exit from "Spirit Prison" - a place akin to purgatory in the Catholic Church. Anyone outside the Mormon faith enters Spirit Prison at the time of their death.

    Even Jesus?

    I guess they've probably baptized Him by now.


    wasn't jesus already baptized?
  • Matticus: Lionel Mandrake: Currently, Mormons believe baptism is necessary for an individual to exit from "Spirit Prison" - a place akin to purgatory in the Catholic Church. Anyone outside the Mormon faith enters Spirit Prison at the time of their death.

    Even Jesus?

    I guess they've probably baptized Him by now.

    wasn't jesus already baptized?


    Not by a Mormon
  • Matticus: Lionel Mandrake: Currently, Mormons believe baptism is necessary for an individual to exit from "Spirit Prison" - a place akin to purgatory in the Catholic Church. Anyone outside the Mormon faith enters Spirit Prison at the time of their death.

    Even Jesus?

    I guess they've probably baptized Him by now.

    wasn't jesus already baptized?


    Sure, but he wasn't Mormon baptized and so was locked out of Heaven.
  • Lionel Mandrake: Matticus: Lionel Mandrake: Currently, Mormons believe baptism is necessary for an individual to exit from "Spirit Prison" - a place akin to purgatory in the Catholic Church. Anyone outside the Mormon faith enters Spirit Prison at the time of their death.

    Even Jesus?

    I guess they've probably baptized Him by now.

    wasn't jesus already baptized?

    Not by a Mormon


    no, but they recognize his baptism as being valid
  • Matticus: Lionel Mandrake: Matticus: Lionel Mandrake: Currently, Mormons believe baptism is necessary for an individual to exit from "Spirit Prison" - a place akin to purgatory in the Catholic Church. Anyone outside the Mormon faith enters Spirit Prison at the time of their death.

    Even Jesus?

    I guess they've probably baptized Him by now.

    wasn't jesus already baptized?

    Not by a Mormon

    no, but they recognize his baptism as being valid


    Better safe than sorry.
  • You: "I hope that old miserable, hateful, stingy, lecherous, fascist, racist, bastard (insert dead relative here) rots in hell!"

    Me: "Too late! Mitt Romney (or some other LDS nut) apparently was related to them, and got them baptized by proxy for you!"

    So there's that. 

    / I wonder what George Carlin is thinking about having been baptized into heaven (or wherever Morons think they go).
    Wait, I think I know! What were those 7 words that George said you can't say?
  • The Time Mormons, by Orson Scott Card.
  • Krymson Tyde: Matticus: Lionel Mandrake: Currently, Mormons believe baptism is necessary for an individual to exit from "Spirit Prison" - a place akin to purgatory in the Catholic Church. Anyone outside the Mormon faith enters Spirit Prison at the time of their death.

    Even Jesus?

    I guess they've probably baptized Him by now.

    wasn't jesus already baptized?

    Sure, but he wasn't Mormon baptized and so was locked out of Heaven.


    Must be like when you get home at 3 AM, stumbling drunk, and remember that your keys are inside the house.
  • If God wouldn't allow Vlad out of Purgatory for his heroic defense against the Ottoman hordes then he is not God and we needn't worry.
  • Anyone outside the Mormon faith enters Spirit Prison at the time of their death.

    Is it "conjugal visit" Spirit Prison, or the dreaded PMITA Spirit Prison?
  • This "Spirit Prison" sounds a lot like the "Iron Prison" of Philip K. Dick's post-psychotic period (as seen in his later novels). Maybe he wasn't in contact with the Roman Catholic Church in Exile or aliens, but with Mormon Jesus.

    Ha! Take that Scott Orson Card!

    I've got The Exegesis of Philip K. Dick on my Kindle. It is interesting to see him trying to explain his experience (dreams, hallucinations, etc.) while waivering between the Christianity of his deceased friend, Southern California mysticism and (science fictiony) science. The interplay between his work and his real life is interesting in itself, but here is an intelligent man trying to come to grips with religion, mythology, politics, and psychosis. Truly a Man in tune with the Zeitgheist of SoCal in the time of Nixon and Reagan. Crazy, Man, crazy. But not stupid.

    People told Dick that the world was turning into the paranoid Gnostic world of his novels. Perhaps this was his greatest fear. Perhaps they were right in some ways.
  • Krymson Tyde: Matticus: Lionel Mandrake: Currently, Mormons believe baptism is necessary for an individual to exit from "Spirit Prison" - a place akin to purgatory in the Catholic Church. Anyone outside the Mormon faith enters Spirit Prison at the time of their death.

    Even Jesus?

    I guess they've probably baptized Him by now.

    wasn't jesus already baptized?

    Sure, but he wasn't Mormon baptized and so was locked out of Heaven.



    But didn't Jesus give St. Peter the "keys of the kingdom of heaven"?

    Who changed the locks?
  • Well you can't baptize Bella Lugosi, from the song I like I hear he's "Undead, undead, undead." :-P
  • I don't think much of baptizing dead people--seems unnecessary--they can choose their fate on Judgment Day even in the eschatology of many more conventional religious denominations and sects, but I do find their genealogical research extremely useful. I have run across allusions to ancestors being "sealed" to so-and-so, presumably the Mormon "sponsor". I am glad that they are not forcing Mormonism and salvation on the dead. This would be presumptuous and I can see why atheists, Jews and others get very upset even at a free-will type of situation.

    Still, it is better than the idea of converting people at sword point like so many Christians and Muslims have done, not to mention extorting belief in exchange for food and other necessities as some of the more aggressive missionaries have been accused of doing (most likely correctly in many cases).

    I just remove the "seal" information from my files--I don't need it and the Mormon Church is sure as Hades not going to lose it unless a terrorist gets into every genealogy centre and Temple in the world and their giant nuclear-bomb proof mountain in Utah. I'd love to see the inside of that baby and to see what kind of family tree they could put together for me from their files. I have topped 25,000 names myself, but a lot of them are people I know aren't related to me but who would become a problem if I just ignored them. I have a surfeit of some families around my "brick walls" because I haven't totally figured out which one is the right one and proven it beyond a doubt.

    I found a marriage certificate for a very likely candidate as sister of my hardest brick wall. She is the daughter, according to a death certificate and other trees, of the very man I have been convinced is No. 1 Candidate for the missing father of my man. Dectective work is fun, but it isn't proven yet and may never be proven. Nonetheless, taking all the clues together, I am over 90% certain I have broken through a brick wall that nobody has yet pierced and found parents which few if any researchers have even considered.

    Another brick wall of mine was demolished to my satisfaction a few days earlier. My proof relies on circumstantail evidence but I am even more certain I am right because the circumstantial evidence is quite plentiful and good. Say 95% certainty. I could be wrong, but you have to take chances once in a while and this might be one of those stories where the detective has to bluff to get a confession out of the suspect--or possibly another suspect.
  • I'd like to see Hitler's rant when they tell him that he is a post-humous Mormon. Where's that meme when you need it? Or has somebody somebody done this? I'm off to Google!
  • Hitler has been baptized at least seven times.

    It obviously hasn't taken yet.
  • brantgoose: I don't think much of baptizing dead people--seems unnecessary--they can choose their fate on Judgment Day even in the eschatology of many more conventional religious denominations and sects, but I do find their genealogical research extremely useful. I have run across allusions to ancestors being "sealed" to so-and-so, presumably the Mormon "sponsor". I am glad that they are not forcing Mormonism and salvation on the dead. This would be presumptuous and I can see why atheists, Jews and others get very upset even at a free-will type of situation.

    Still, it is better than the idea of converting people at sword point like so many Christians and Muslims have done, not to mention extorting belief in exchange for food and other necessities as some of the more aggressive missionaries have been accused of doing (most likely correctly in many cases).

    I just remove the "seal" information from my files--I don't need it and the Mormon Church is sure as Hades not going to lose it unless a terrorist gets into every genealogy centre and Temple in the world and their giant nuclear-bomb proof mountain in Utah. I'd love to see the inside of that baby and to see what kind of family tree they could put together for me from their files. I have topped 25,000 names myself, but a lot of them are people I know aren't related to me but who would become a problem if I just ignored them. I have a surfeit of some families around my "brick walls" because I haven't totally figured out which one is the right one and proven it beyond a doubt.

    I found a marriage certificate for a very likely candidate as sister of my hardest brick wall. She is the daughter, according to a death certificate and other trees, of the very man I have been convinced is No. 1 Candidate for the missing father of my man. Dectective work is fun, but it isn't proven yet and may never be proven. Nonetheless, taking all the clues together, I am over 90% certain I have broken through a brick wall that nobody has yet pierced and found parents which few if any researchers have even considered.

    Another brick wall of mine was demolished to my satisfaction a few days earlier. My proof relies on circumstantail evidence but I am even more certain I am right because the circumstantial evidence is quite plentiful and good. Say 95% certainty. I could be wrong, but you have to take chances once in a while and this might be one of those stories where the detective has to bluff to get a confession out of the suspect--or possibly another suspect.


    So who are you related to?
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