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  • Irradiate it. If we irradiated our food, you could keep raw porkchops in your glove compartment until you're damn well ready to eat them. Months, years, whatever. You could even eat them raw if you wanted. Think of it!
  • Il Douchey: Irradiate it. If we irradiated our food, you could keep raw porkchops in your glove compartment until you're damn well ready to eat them. Months, years, whatever. You could even eat them raw if you wanted. Think of it!


    Does that hold true for raw bacon? Because, who hasn't wanted to eat a slab of raw bacon at one time or another?
  • The "sell by" date on grocery store hamburger will move at least two days closer to the present. If testing is slower than the hoped-for two days all the meat will rot before it reaches consumers.

    In other news, Il Douchey must be J. Frank Parnell's alt.
  • Pud: Does that hold true for raw bacon? Because, who hasn't wanted to eat a slab of raw bacon at one time or another?


    This is silly, but I was once caught eating raw bacon while drunk-sleepwalking. You know what I'm talking about. That time you went to pee in the closet at 4am? You're conscious enough to move around and manipulate objects, but your brain is only running on auxiliary power.

    She found me sitting the kitchen table, gnawing on raw bacon. Any other girl would have dumped me right there, but she had a sense of humor.

    /didn't get sick, thankfully
  • This move is most likely to encourage meat producers to finally start tracking their damn cattle. They've been obfuscating the source of processed meat in order to dodge responsibility for poisoning the population, because tracking the carcass is "just too hard", even though every other industrialized country manages.
  • ZAZ: The "sell by" date on grocery store hamburger will move at least two days closer to the present. If testing is slower than the hoped-for two days all the meat will rot before it reaches consumers.

    In other news, Il Douchey must be J. Frank Parnell's alt.


    Store ground beef is an abomination already.
  • dickfreckle: Pud: Does that hold true for raw bacon? Because, who hasn't wanted to eat a slab of raw bacon at one time or another?

    This is silly, but I was once caught eating raw bacon while drunk-sleepwalking. You know what I'm talking about. That time you went to pee in the closet at 4am? You're conscious enough to move around and manipulate objects, but your brain is only running on auxiliary power.

    She found me sitting the kitchen table, gnawing on raw bacon. Any other girl would have dumped me right there, but she had a sense of humor.

    /didn't get sick, thankfully


    Pfft! You aint sleep-eating till the raw bacon is wrapped around a stick of butter being used to dip frosting out of a can.
  • Great, one more reason for the price of groceries to go higher than they already are.
  • Pfft! You ain't livin until an extra thick center cut slice is wrapped around your turgid member, whilst your body heat and friction renders the fat into nature's perfect lube...

    /at least that's what I've been told
  • Last time I checked bacon tends to be cured, like ham. so not exactly "raw". If raw it would simply be called a pork belly. Most bacon is smoked or cured and that involves being cooked at a low temp for some time. In addition to lots of salt and or brine. It's a process that tends to kill or at least minimized bacteria and fungus. Not the same as just cutting it off the pig and eating it as is.
  • Store ground beef is an abomination already.

    I haven't trusted ground beef for a long time, store bought or fast food. The new rules won't make a difference to me.
  • Subby's mom also knows about holding meat as evidenced by all the previous commenters who are too wise to let on and mention it.
  • Pud: Il Douchey: Irradiate it. If we irradiated our food, you could keep raw porkchops in your glove compartment until you're damn well ready to eat them. Months, years, whatever. You could even eat them raw if you wanted. Think of it!

    Does that hold true for raw bacon? Because, who hasn't wanted to eat a slab of raw bacon at one time or another?


    *raises hand slowly*

    I can honestly say I've never wanted to eat raw bacon. And I've eaten sushi, ceviche, and gored gored more than once, so it's not just that I'm turned off by the thought of eating any meat raw.
  • BitwiseShift: Subby's mom also knows about holding meat as evidenced by all the previous commenters who are too wise to let on and mention it.


    ...when Subby makes the self-deprecating joke right in the headline, there's really no need for a "Your Mom" follow-up.
  • dickfreckle: Pud: Does that hold true for raw bacon? Because, who hasn't wanted to eat a slab of raw bacon at one time or another?

    This is silly, but I was once caught eating raw bacon while drunk-sleepwalking. You know what I'm talking about. That time you went to pee in the closet at 4am? You're conscious enough to move around and manipulate objects, but your brain is only running on auxiliary power.

    She found me sitting the kitchen table, gnawing on raw bacon. Any other girl would have dumped me right there, but she had a sense of humor.

    /didn't get sick, thankfully



    Sounds like an Ambien adventure.
  • Pfft you ain't sleep eating until you are eating jelly belly's out of the chest cavity of a freshly murdered homeless guy
  • Il Douchey: Irradiate it. If we irradiated our food, you could keep raw porkchops in your glove compartment until you're damn well ready to eat them. Months, years, whatever. You could even eat them raw if you wanted. Think of it!


    Exactly, would be cheaper and more effective than test and hold.
  • Il Douchey: Irradiate it. If we irradiated our food, you could keep raw porkchops in your glove compartment until you're damn well ready to eat them. Months, years, whatever. You could even eat them raw if you wanted. Think of it!


    Is that why Kobe beef is so good?
  • SirDigbyChickenCaesar: Il Douchey: Irradiate it. If we irradiated our food, you could keep raw porkchops in your glove compartment until you're damn well ready to eat them. Months, years, whatever. You could even eat them raw if you wanted. Think of it!

    Is that why Kobe beef is so good?


    I've heard you can only get that in Colorado hotel rooms... whether you want it or not.
  • Great news, now if they can just get the fecal matter and antibiotics out of it, well, it might just be able to be called Beef again.

    Instead of "That Red Crap" in the plastic tray. Or was that Pink Slime, or Scrapings. Always get them mixed up.

    Congenital problems on the rise? Autism you say? Well son, look at the one common aspect we all share - we eat!
  • Marcus Aurelius: This move is most likely to encourage meat producers to finally start tracking their damn cattle. They've been obfuscating the source of processed meat in order to dodge responsibility for poisoning the population, because tracking the carcass is "just too hard", even though every other industrialized country manages.


    Uh, they do track their cattle quite well.

    When the meat goes in a box they can tie that back with 100% certainty to the lot it came from and with a decent certainty of even which animal it came from. Lots vary in size, but generally aren't larger than a few dozen head.

    The animals have "kill tags" which tie it to a supplier and they can tell who sold it to them, where it was born, where it was raised and what feed lot it came from before slaughter.

    If you have a problem with that, then perhaps you should go vegan.

    Also, recalls cast a very wide net. If e. coli is found in one animal the producer is likely to recall hundreds of animals.
  • Happy Hours: Marcus Aurelius: This move is most likely to encourage meat producers to finally start tracking their damn cattle. They've been obfuscating the source of processed meat in order to dodge responsibility for poisoning the population, because tracking the carcass is "just too hard", even though every other industrialized country manages.

    Uh, they do track their cattle quite well.

    When the meat goes in a box they can tie that back with 100% certainty to the lot it came from and with a decent certainty of even which animal it came from. Lots vary in size, but generally aren't larger than a few dozen head.

    The animals have "kill tags" which tie it to a supplier and they can tell who sold it to them, where it was born, where it was raised and what feed lot it came from before slaughter.

    If you have a problem with that, then perhaps you should go vegan.

    Also, recalls cast a very wide net. If e. coli is found in one animal the producer is likely to recall hundreds of animals.


    This must be a recent development. I haven't been involved in the industry since the 1990's.
  • Il Douchey: Irradiate it. If we irradiated our food, you could keep raw porkchops in your glove compartment until you're damn well ready to eat them. Months, years, whatever. You could even eat them raw if you wanted. Think of it!


    Strangely, this idea appeals to me.

    /yeah, I'm fat
  • ReapTheChaos: Great, one more reason for the price of groceries to go higher than they already are.


    Societal Priorities:

    1. Money
    2. Health and welfare
  • FTA: But FSIS officials said they anticipate that negative test results will be determined within two days.

    Something tells me this is a golden opportunity for an entrepreneur to invent a new rapid result test. It's the free market at work!

    Happy Hours: Lots vary in size, but generally aren't larger than a few dozen head.


    Where are you from? Because the feed lots I see in Kansas are well over a few dozen head.
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