21 Years USAF (retired)(Nebraska, Alaska, Panama, Turkey, Germany, Georgia, Colorado) 3C0 (computer geek). Divorced, ten-year old son. Now I work for the school board on their mainframe. Laid off from the school board.

By Pocket Ninja

Stress? Why would I feel stress? Just because that fat woman across the street was mowing her lawn at 7:00 in the morning last Sunday and woke me up and I had to look out the window and see her fat ass crammed into those gym shorts that get stuck a quarter of the way down her sweaty thighs so that it looks from the rear like she's trying to turn a pup tent into a g-string? Should that make me feel stressed? Or maybe because that guy in the green Mercedes, the one holding a cell phone in one hand and travel mug of coffee in the other, insisted on going 58 miles an hour in the left lane of the Beltway and wouldn't move over and wouldn't speed up except for when someone tried to pass him on the right, at which point he'd accelerate until another car blocked the attempt? Or maybe that clerk at the supermarket who spent the whole time she was checking out my groceries talking with her boyfriend on her cellphone, or the guy who threw a cigarette out his car window that exploded against my windshield like a tiny supernova. Or getting the rotisserie chicken home and finding it pink and bloody inside, and the matchlight charcoal that WOULDN'T LIGHT NO MATTER HOW MANY GODDAMN TIMES I TRIED AND I BURNED MY FARKING HAND ON IT YOU FARKING ASSHATS AND NO I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO GIVE YOU THREE MONTHS' NOTICE TO CANCEL MY GYM MEMBERSHIP AND I'M NOT PAYING FOR THOSE EXTRA MONTHS AND FARK YOU SPRINT I HAVE UNLIMITED TEXT MESSAGES I'VE ALWAYS HAD UNLIMITED TEXT MESSAGES SO WHY ARE YOU CHARGING ME FOR THEM AND GODDAMNIT IT YOU COMCAST MOTHERFARKERS IF I LOSE MY BROADBAND CONNECTION AGAIN I'M GOING TO SHOW UP WITH MY RIFLE AND I SWEAR TO GOD IF THEY FORGET TO TAKE MY RECYCLING BIN ONE MORE TIME I'M GONNA START FIREBOMBING TRASH TRUCKS AUGHHGHSGKDLKNBRDHS?LNBHL

http://www.fark.com/cgi/comments.pl?IDLink=1688267

At about 1:24, from Mikey-Mop.

"I do my best to keep my son from bothering other people when we're in public places. I really do. But I am nonetheless very protective of the right that both he and I have to be there. If we happen to share a restaurant or plane with you in the near future, you'll just have to trust that I'm doing my part as a conscientious member of society and a generally nice guy. But I have very little tolerance for people who want to banish young children from normal life, and I don't take kindly to dysfunctional hatred of children."

http://www.fark.com/cgi/comments.pl?IDLink=3555062

I'm convinced that this got greenlit by the "Random Greenlight" button the admins have.

http://www.fark.com/cgi/comments.pl?IDLink=2806830